Table Manners

Set on keeping the peace, we don’t resist her request and continue to pile in, but Mother hangs back.

“I don’t have enough gas in my car to get there and back,” she says, with an all too revealing look. I shrug again – less than 10 minutes in her company and I’m fed up. Renee says they’ll make it work. Five adults squeeze into my little 4-door sedan – Lawrence as my co-pilot, with Devon and Mother separated by the only thing in this world they still share, their daughter. A heavy tension descends upon us and refuses to shake loose until we leave for our hotel later that evening.

At the run-of-the-mill buffet, we share our meal in silence. We are voracious eaters, but keep our table manners in mind. As the meal draws to a close, I begin to note more closely how Mother has been eating – heartily and without a thought to chewing before swallowing her food. In my 17 years under her roof, we were expected to have exemplary table manners, no matter how hungry we were. To see this side of her is a new leaf, and I’m not sure a positive one.

Feeling like a fool, I connect the dots on why Renee requested we include Mother. I wonder how long it’s been since she’s eaten, and eaten “properly” to boot. Again, I am floored by the generosity and kindness of Renee’s heart – Mother is pulling her away from the one place she’s made a stand to remain at (along with a lengthy laundry list of other wrongs) and yet she is still concerned for Mother’s well-being. Sometimes she seems too old for her age – like she is raising Mother instead of the other way around.

We drop them off at their hotel and make our way to ours. It’s been a long day and we’re ready to recharge our batteries for tomorrow, Renee’s graduation. Navigating our way in the dark, we contemplate on how bizarre this day has been and the unexpected moving issue that has overshadowed the barely begun weekend.

"At least now you've had dinner with my in-laws," I tease Lawrence, who has just met Mother for the first time. 

"And it went as badly as you predicted. Your stories really weren't made-up."